So explain to me again how you wake up next to a Brazilian model and I wake up next to a turkey sub? And a jar of grey poupon.
She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
Welp, I just herniated a vocal cord during sex. How was your night?
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
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