you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Randomize
