weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
if i die of alcohol poisoning tonight, just know i kinda expected it and totally deserved it
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
Cover your peen. We're going out.
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
Randomize
