My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
Randomize