Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
Randomize
