Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
It doesn't matter how many times you look in your purse, Your keys are not going to be there. Maybe you left them at the bar.
Maybe they fell out of my pocket last night when I rolled down the hill.
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
The groom's brother was an accomplishment. Then I remembered he was also the officiant. Check and check.
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
I TAUGHT HER CAT TO SIT. CATS DON'T FUCKING SIT ON COMMAND. BUT THIS ONE DID!
It's basically my crowning achievement.
Randomize
