I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
Randomize
