My hand turned me down
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
The amount of alcohol I'm going to consume on my birthday is directly proportional to the amount of shit I've had to put up with this past year. Which is a lot.
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
Randomize
