i permit you to call me
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize