What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
I'm babysitting and we're watching Barney and I don't understand why Barney can magically make band hats appear but he makes them make shitty ass instruments.
Barney's a jerk
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
Randomize