I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
so when our kids ask "when did you know you loved mommy?" you're gonna say "when she sent me emoticons about slobbing on my knob?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
So how do you explain to your boss that Siri called him mid sex?
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
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