Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
Found my phone laying in a snow angel outside my apt this morning.
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
His wife just cheated on him for the third time. I'm his first extra-marital fling, that makes it ok, right? You know to keep karma balanced in the universe
Your logic is flawless...
Randomize
