My face smells like last night's lay. I need a whore bath. Or a corndog.
i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's alarming how good I'm getting at being productive at work on Thursday after Johnny Walker Wednesdays.
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
Was not aware that standing loudly up off the couch and loudly, drunkenly slurring "I'M EIGHTEEN NOW BITCHES" counted as a primitive mating call.
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
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