I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
Well when I woke up this morning I didn’t think I’d be masturbating to my own LinkedIn profile today but here we are
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