Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
She kicked in my bedroom door in only high-heals with a bottle of wine, announcing it was "cock-o-clock"
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
Just delivered a pizza to a holiday inn and a delivery driver from Me n Ed's walked up at the same time, we both were going to the same floor so we stood in the elevator making small talk about delivery stuff, but a small part of me wanted to deck him, stand over him and shout,"FOR THE HUT MOTHERFUCKER, FOR THE HUT!"
Jesus christ, don't start a pizza delivery gang war.
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
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