If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
the maid of honor just got in a fight with the mother of the bride at a gas station across the street. best. wedding. ever.
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need to do something profound in the next three and a half years so that when my kids ask what I did in my twenties I have something to say other than "made bad decisions"
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
I just found a live peacock hanging out behind the bar. I coerced it into my car and now I have a peacock bro that lives with me.
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
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