apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
You went into the bathroom, got in the tub with a pillow, yelled "this isn't as comfortable as it looks in the movies" then passed out
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