she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
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