I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
im about to bake her parents a "thank you for making such beautiful babies, ive had sex with all 5 of them" cake
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
Randomize
