I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
Whatever, you're gonna have to break it to mom that the reason I was so drunk at Christmas dinner is because she wouldn't stop asking me why I don't have a boyfriend
Let's get the cat blown out
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
Randomize
