Apparently they want to see what I've been working on for the last three months. Can I just hand them a bunch of empty fifths?
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
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Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
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Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.