this wart on my finger ripped off while i was fingering this girl the other night. she thought she had gotten her period and started crying so i went with. its better for both of us that way
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
Randomize
