Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
My mom just bought me $200 worth of booze on the condition that I promise I won't have to go to rehab eventually
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
Randomize