thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
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