I'm surprised I didn't puke tonight
Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
We got banned from that Whataburger for life. WHATABURGER. Which is saying something. They deal with drunk dumbasses every night.
Tequila happens.
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
Randomize
