you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
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He showed up in a dinosaur costume bearing a tray of cupcakes. He even let me hold his tail. I'm marrying this guy.
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
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He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
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