OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
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