Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
You've got to be fucking kidding me. Do you think "Husband drunkenly pees all over floors" is reasonable grounds for divorce? So pissed off right now.
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
When you can't finish your jumbo margarita and figure pouring it into a to go box will suffice... Midnight snack?
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
Interesting fact: if you wanted to rename a guy Jeff, just tell him you only fuck Jeffs. Magically whatever name he was using is actually his middle name cause he doesn't like going by Jeff.
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
Randomize