that's an acceptable place to lick
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
Found plan b box covered with blood. In kitchen sick. Pickle jar is empty. Wtf happened?
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
My life is a joke. Told everyone last night that they could call me Mrs. McCormick because I'm gonna end up alone with a handle of peach vodka anyways.
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
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