it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
Meeting relatives from another state drenched in tequila and smelling of weed. I'm gonna kill you for soaking the only bra I brought in Jose Cuervo Gold.
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
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