im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
if i died would you start the facebook group?
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
Randomize
