She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
You left me with no money to have random Chicago sex. The least you can do is pick me up an egg mcmuffin on your walk of shame back to the hotel.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
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