I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
Randomize
