I'm really into asian looking animals
How drunk are you??
I'm flawless.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
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