Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
I woke up this morning and thought "Im sure I've seen this house in a porno" and instantly googlemapped myself
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
Woke up. Made a pizza. Burnt it. Going back to bed cuz today sucks
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
Dear sober self: your car keys are in the glove compartment, your car is outside the church. I hope you're reading this from your own bed instead of someone else's.
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
Randomize