angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
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