I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
Randomize