Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
You drunk-dialed me and asked me to describe my burrito
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
Randomize
