More tranny stories later!
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
Toaster
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
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