Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
sitting next to michael phelps in the airport. wonder if he's carrying...
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
I been sleeping but occasionally wake up feeling like tiny elves are in my throat ripping my esophagus to shreds with their bare hands.
Somehow, you made that sound extremely magical and not at all painful.
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
Oh hello Jordan's parents, I'm here to have sex with your son. He's in the shower? Oh great, I'll join him
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
Randomize
