White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
Just paid my credit card bill at the bar. This phone makes it so I never have to leave
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
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