Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Randomize
