You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
I wish I only lived at night.
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
I remember telling you that I think Taylor Swift has stolen my essence. I still think that's true.
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
Just got the test results back; apparently I'm red-green colorblind. this explains the past 18 years of my life and i'm wondering why i didn't realize this sooner
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
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