so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
I made $130 by ordering two pizzas and charging them $10 a slice. If they weren't so stoned they might have realized they could have just ordered another pizza for $20.
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
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