BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
Euphemism? No, "pantsless vodka yoga" is a legitimate pastime of mine
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
My girlfriend is talking to my ex-boyfriend at the bar right now. I REPEAT, GIRLFRIEND IS TALKING TO EX BOYFRIEND RIGHT NOW. GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF THIS PLAACE
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
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