nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
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he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
He just walked up to me in the kitchen, pulled out his penis and stuck it in my sweatpants pocket.
It was probably cold. Sweatpants pockets are notoriously warm.
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You better buy her a motherfucking bunnyrabit to make up for this. And me footsie pajamas for being a cockblock.
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
I've started brushing my teeth at 6pm, because honestly alcohol is the only thing I consume after that
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
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