Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
Why is there a cactus in the microwave?
Don't worry about it.
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
shape ups are the best shoes to wear when youre stoned. its like walking on little trampolines every step.
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
I can't come tonight. Someone took a shit in the dressing room. A.) Clean it up or B.) Kill myself. Text back with your answer.
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
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