Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
He called me at 4am to ask me to marry him, then threw up into the phone for 10 minutes.
okay, but you can't tell anyone. Every time he instagrams something with the caption "avocado," it means he's booty calling me. Happy?
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
Randomize
