Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing like sitting at your midterm pissed at yourself because you put your graphing calculator batteries in your vibrator and forgot to put them back in before the exam 😑
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
Nothing like having a family watch you dry heave at the end of the dock
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