I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
I lost my phone so I put sticky notes all over my roommates body asking her to wake me up at 7:00 AM.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
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