I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
i totally just wrapped her wedding gift in tin foil. These are the skills 2 bachelor's degrees have given me.
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
Promise me you will not let me do anything sexual with or to a mini horse no matter how drunk we get. Ever.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
Randomize
