I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
As she was leaving she said "You have an awesome penis, I hope to use it again soon" I need that on a business card to hand out at the bar
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
Randomize